The Truth About This Blog

The truth… 

the truth is that 

where I’m at 

right now 

in this moment of my life 

It’s fuzzy 

messy

grainy 

I 

am fuzzy

messy

grainy (whatever that means)

The truth is that 

I am 

in the middle 

of nowhere 

Of so many spaces in time 

Of being a new mom 

of leaving my full-time job 

of wondering where to focus my energy

of questioning if I am biting off more than I can chew, 

or is my bite too small? 

Am I overcomplicating my life (again)? 

am I giving up on myself by not purising it all? 

can I trust this? 

am I trying hard enough? 

All daily questions 

before the fog settles into my brain come late afternoon

like thick mist over the ocean’s water

Everything becomes distant 

Except my daughter 

and the trees that surround 

How am I even writing this? 

“I don’t know.” I type back 

I don’t know.

I write this at 9:10 pm on Wednesday, January 1st of 2025. Yes, the new year. One that I am ready to fall into, excited for all the changes in my life to unfold. And another piece of me, fearing what is to come with our nation, wondering what is worse; staying or leaving…  

Anyway, it is past my bedtime, and my eyes blink with enough frequency that I know better than to stay up. But here’s the thing, I got hit, hit with the familiar fire of inspiration. So I stay here, listening, watching these words shoot from my fingertips and appear on the white page of my computer screen. I love it here.  

This blog is another space, for you and I, to make sense of life, using one of the only ways I know how; through words. As life happens, I will continue to process through writing; sometimes it’ll land here. And maybe, it’ll send ripples out to you, sending along your own sort of inspiration, something that’ll help you understand yourself a little more too. Or, maybe this will simply serve as some sort of entertainment. That’s cool too. Regardless, I’m glad you’re here. 

P.S. Not knowing where you’re at is okay. In fact, it’s a great place to start.